When can I fart in front of her?
Oh, don’t you worry homeskillet this episode is already scheduled for Season 2! It’s a huge issue…sometimes. Depends on what you ate for dinner.
The worst though is when you don’t mean to fart. Like, as a dude, let’s face it, you’re almost expected to. So when you do indeed fart for the first time it’s almost better to make a scene out of it. But you’ll run into those times when you’re laughing really hard and all the sudden, just yeah, you and the girl are wrapped in a blanket of sticky heat that smells like a cross between the floor of a burrito stand at 3am and a Venture fitting room. I consider that to be even worse than just full on ripping one out.
For a girl, they’ll hold it in for years…until that one day. You’re just having a nice night, laying around, perhaps you’re spooning on the couch. She’s laying in front of you, you’re giving a little nibble on her ear, got your arm wrapped around her midsection and you’re thinking “I’m gonna get this going so we can have some sex all up in here!” And then just….just, farts on your dick. And she thinks it’s hysterical. Starts cracking up thinking she’s gotten the ultimate revenge on you for over 2 years of dutch ovens. All hope of sex is immediately stripped from the night as the thought of pushing into her, like fluffy cotton into a Build-A-Bear, may only release more toxins. And even though you fart all the time, hers just seem so much more gross. Even worse…it’s on your dick! What the %&*$!!!!
We’ll definitely get into this a little more in-depth in the episode, but yeah…my advice, 3rd time spending the night. You’ve gotta make sure it’s a good one though. Give that fart some girth and let it rip.