Do I remove my friend’s ex from Facebook and Twitter now that they broke up?

So this past year I added my friends girlfriends on FB and Twitter. Now they broke up. I've spent a lot of time partying and hanging out with them (I even have pictures tagged!). But now they broke up. Should I delete them or restrict? Is there an unspoken rule or etiquette to follow when you friend your friends gf/bf and they've broken up? - Jessica from Chicago, IL

Jessica,

There are no unspoken rules for this one.  The rules are whatever you want to make them.  We actually will be featuring an episode in the near future, specifically regarding this topic and how to handle it.  But since that is a ways away, I might as well suggest this piece of advice.  I understand that your friends broke up, and I am sorry to hear that, but at the same time, this is part of your life that you are photographing.  If both parties are requesting that you remove the pictures, then I would say it might be good to follow their wishes.  But if it is only one person who is requesting and the other one isn’t, then I would say it’s your call.  That person clearly has the choice to unfriend or untag themselves from a photo if it really bothers them.  And if neither party says anything to you, then I would say it is your call and your decision.  I guess the way I see it is like this. . . these are photographs of your life, they mark special occasions, and great milestones in your life.  You may not think about it now, but one day you might look back thru some of these photos and wish they weren’t deleted, because let’s face it, a picture is worth a thousand words.   And well, would you like those words deleted from your life/memory banks for good?  Keep the good reminders, toss the bad if they are truly bad, but remember this one comes down to your call.


I’m going to say it all depends on your intentions. If you plan on banging the broad, drop it. Don’t do that (yes, even if you are a girl). Don’t sleep with your buddy’s ex. You’re better than that.

If it’s purely a friendship kind of thing, then that’s alright, you can remain friends, but DO NOT initiate contact or barely respond. Your purpose at that point is simply a means for her to snoop on your friend through your Facebook page.

Personally, I’m okay with friends remaining friends with my exes, as long the ex isn’t being stupid about it.  Just, as my friend, don’t be posting on her wall all the time, hitting her up to come out. Yeah, you can be “friends” on Facebook, but keep in mind that she was never YOUR friend.

As much as you thought she was YOUR friend, she was HIS girlfriend, and in turn your friend’s girlfriend. Your friend’s GIRLFRIEND. And if they’re broken up, nobody wants their ex still lingering around in their life. It’s time to move on past that. It is SOOO shitty when your friend’s keep your ex around after YOU dropped them.  Ugh!

Final consensus: You don’t need to de-friend them, but definitely don’t be all buddy-buddy w/ them. They can just be a part of your repertoire.


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