Is it so wrong to appreciate another woman’s beauty?

I am a married man. I love my wife very much, but from time to time a girl on the street will catch my eye and receive a long glance. I'm not pervvy about it, and it's honestly just an appreciative glance. Apparently I'm awful at being subtle, because my wife catches me every time. I've tried to talk to her about how it doesn't mean a thing at all, and I would never in my life cheat on my wife! Is it so wrong to appreciate another woman's beauty? - Lee from Portland, OR

Dude…seriously?!?  The only person you should be admiring is YOUR OWN WIFE and her beauty! If you’re married there should be NO reason to look and “admire’ or “appreciate” another women. Its even worse that your doing it right in-front of your wife!!! How rude, inconsiderate, and disrespectful can you be?!

You may be thinking, “It was a harmless look.” But the fact is, it doesn’t matter to women. Its all the same…looking is looking. Men and women’s minds are programmed completely different, but guys are all programmed the same way. Its what goes on in your mind after the “admiring” is done. If your faithful and respectful husband you’ll leave it at that, and appreciate ONLY your wife’s beauty later in the bedroom 😉  But, if your one of those D-Bag asshole husbands, one of two things are going through your mind. 1) What does the other women look like naked and 2) How is she in bed? It’s the same thing if you’re watching a movie or TV when an attractive women catches your eye, and you get turned on with an erection. Then, try to hide it because you feel guilty about getting sexually aroused by another women…and you should!!!!  Its a total slap in the face!  The fact of the matter is, how does your wife know what your really thinking??

On a side note… In the Bible it says having a wandering eye is considered a form of cheating. If a MARRIED man was caught looking at another woman they would scoop his eye out, and burn it to signify the flames of hell. Just something to think about…

Basically, what you’re saying to your wife is you’re interested in another woman on a physical, emotional or mental level.  When you look at other women it  makes her feel insecure, not attractive enough, or not wanted. You seem like a good husband, and would never intentionally hurt your wife, so don’t! Instead, you should start admiring your own wife’s beauty and appreciating what’s right in-front of you…stop being selfish and inconsiderate! If you catch yourself doing it, stop yourself in the moment, gain some SELF CONTROL and RESPECT, think about how upset it makes your wife feel, then compliment her instead. Put yourself in your wife’s shoes. It may not seem like a big deal to you, but its hurting your wife and that should be reason enough to stop. Once you stop, you’ll also gain your wife’s trust back and start making her feel better about herself.

So basically… If you want to admire some beauty…get on a train, go downtown, and buy yourself a ticket to the art show!

Have some respect for your wife, your marriage, and most importantly yourself.

Absolutely not. Appreciate the shit out of it…just, privately, in your head…or in the shower later when you’re alone. But c’mon, she’s gotta loosen up a bit here. This is like a TV sitcom plot from when TV sitcoms were first invented. We’re dudes. I’d say we look but we don’t touch…but if it’s really good, later, when we’re alone…we’re touching.

Here’s my big problem with this. It’s marriage. MARRIAGE! Faith. Commitment. Love. Honor. Trust. All those things. That’s a LOT to ask…I think. Not that I’m against marriage, but it’s not like you’re suppose to become a monk when you do. Haha! Was just going to make some reference about being with one hand for the first part of your sex life, then one woman for the rest of your sex life….but you have two hands…and I couldn’t really figure out how to tie that back in except by saying, “have two women!” WHICH, would probably get my balls cut off by Nicole.

For something like this though, wouldn’t it be better to be open and honest in the relationship. Just because you’re looking at some chick on the street and she’s drooling over the dude from Grey’s Anatomy, it’s the same shit. Those innate sexual urges and magnetism towards attractive people is always going to be there. You shouldn’t have to bury it deep down inside. For instance, would you take notice of a good looking man too? Viktor Stalberg of the Chicago Blackhawks…good looking man. I’m not ashamed to admit it. It’s not like I’m checking him out, he just has a certain set of features which have constructed him into a very good looking guy. I know what aesthetically pleasing is, whether it’s male or female.

So personally, I think the wife needs to loosen up a bit here. Sit her down, give her a little, “babe, listen. I wrote into this relationship advice site and JoE told me you need to loosen the f#&% up on this whole “me checking out other broads” thing. I’m a man. It’s what men do. My body is always looking to spread it’s seed with the finest mate. I’m human, and I can’t change that. If I did…I’d be alien. Did you see what they tried to do to ET?!”

Ohhhh, yeah, that’s good. Use that!